this is uttoxeter callingin the last penotument episode number five of the dogging story from 2013 as agents dealer chelsea a right pair of boots and mr pussy go on the hynt of who are the doggers of olde whippy cross woof.
prevousley on bill as the pissed as a newt family get the better off him as he getts into his panda beep beep yea and radios for ever covers ,so we return to agents dealer and chesea as thay walk passed the newts stronghold .i say old been look at mr pussy hes like a cat on a hot tin roof as he stares into the water i say old been binky do you think hes pauceing for thought as mr pussy looks up and annoces no im looking for the kitty katt fish oh your so catty mr pussy said binky .as chelsea known as tarquin says is that like thous fishes that man catches on the tv i saw him catch a big one now what was it called oh i know a tampoon it was a monster looking thing oh yes said binky i reamember that one i thought it was a bit fissy to me okay yarr .i say mr pussy why are you standing there cross legged ? we olde thing its like this one is dyeing for a tinkel but this cat suits so tight and ive broken the zip on it oh i say pussy olde thing thats really bad form youll just have to cross your leggs old been .all of a sudden binkys tail starts to flash as mr pussy said your flashing red wite and blue old thing switch your white knob on to recive the message it must be from our leeder mr platform the higigh flyer of the m169 agencey .asa dealer binky turns on the trainsmitter the signalls all fuzzy just a minute says tarquin chelsea moove your tail to the right still no thing well try the right no same thing olde been well cock your leg up you know youll love that possition i say olde been how frightfully common as the voice comes accross the air waves this is writtle calling writtle calling i say olde been whos that thats not mr platform .moove your leg higher nothing now lower now stick it will be a great night if you can get your leg over tonight olde been as the sky turns green as they look up what is it as i voice says hello darlin as this grren long monster appears with brown and yellow fur on it by george great scot binky and tarrquin looks in admazement whos that a ufo .as mr pussy pipes up and says ive heard of this people back in the 1970s 1974 to be presize there was this race called the braintree boliler thay had this 5ft tonge that would appear wow said binky it looks like there back from 1974 how simpley spiffing olde been you get your hands on your knob chelsea olde been oh okay as he turns his knob get into possition chelsea as annother voice come on air this is great conard calling the sudbury town here want to make contact with you we are your friends we watch anglia tv closer to home .no that s not it your tails stiffening try the red button as at last mr platforms voice come through so gentall men i await your reports on your return ,as mr pussy takes off as dealer says to chelsea i recon hes bionic he cant be as thay paws for thought why do you say that olde friut ? after all thay havent got the tecnoigey look chelsea theres a pair of rangers over there oh i say are they 14 or 20 hold i used to have a oxblood pair thay was qiute comfee well i used to have a pair of doc martins as dealer said i dont think doc martin minded me having a pair of his boots but now the boots on the other foot i now wear dealers i know olde been such a hoot .as they walk up five aker field the farmer with the traacktor is stopped as old bill goes to investergate hello hello hello whats we have here then ? as farmer paul says ive got a bran new conbine havester have you got a key as ive lost mine i see says olde bill no i havent jolly bad show youll have to either get a hair gripp or call the ad the y will have one eventally the purple van turns up and the man brings the key as they go on there way oh look theres a big black marrior comeing i recon olde bills got that to take the family of newts to the nick for the night i say dealer i heared shes a right olde bitch any way as they walk along they come accross this pink thing in the busshes i say binker give that ball a kick we will play football as he kicks the ball this bad fouwl laungwich comes from this tall bloke to them as chelses says thats really not cricket i thought your head was a ball sorry olde friute well chelsea whys them blokes chasing mr pussy oh yes and look theres annother black pussy oh look its really manky looking thing as they enter the woods they coulnt see the woods for the trees oh i say there cars with steamy winders rocking up and down so thats must be what they do here tell mr platform as for me all i found was the knight of olde in the woods the end next time agents dealer and chelsea go on the hunt of the pink finger of olde brown hills town closer to home
coming soon this is cannock calling in west stafford shire closer to home dynnargh welclome falite croeso
so lets return to 2013 its woof woof the dogging story as agents dealer chelsea and mr pussy go on the hunt of the doggers dynnargh welclome falite croeso
so gentall maen you may go remember to return at 1700 to be airliffted to whippy cross first of all you may finesh your tea even thous its five past three dont forget you will also be issussed with pillers oh i love piller talk said mr pussy funny you should say that said agent dealer all i do is talk to my piller talk to my piller talk to me piller i say dealer you do a lot of talking dont you .now then gentall men reamember your british yes sir thank you sir now gents lets just clarrifie the rute once the hellicopter leaves you the land marks are as specified asa you will obsverve the main points are to look out for the hill of stephen you walk up 560 yards to the base camp where you might find some benifit you say hi to the god of tea up and then walk to the summett of annother 870yards eta 30 mins then continue to 5 aker field passed the land of newts reamember they allways get pissed as a newt after 7pm then it on to the tree on the hanging hill before you cum to open terrane reamember dont go to far you dont want to go passed the leyton wappers terrirtys or youll end up in thy market town called barking in woofing terrirey have you got that gentall men stand to attention on the double at ease gentall men now dissmiss no you mr pussy youll stay behind you two are free to go thank you sir .be seated mr pussy as mr platform gets the bright light out and switches it on sit pussy sit now you have some explaining to do first of all we dont torriate lateness why was you late well sorry sir well im waiting well siur i was talking to catnip who offerd me some catnip sent at cost i had very little change so i had to go to the catflap machine to aqiure more and then he said go cat go cat .i see and why have you love bites on your neck well sir its like this i got into a cat fight in my new cat suit with a old manky pussy ,dont let this happen again agent pussy dissmiss yes sir thank you sir and dont be late it was soon 17oo hours gentall men glad to see your all on time .now follow me to the roof yes sir thay all said as the hellicoper arrived as it nearly blew them off the roof as agent dealer said i bet men thats the best blow job you ever had ? mr dealer reamember your british really you silly little man .climb abord the ship said the captain ship what you meen >? cocks away tally hoe its a terminoligy gents as they close the cockj pit door as they got air born oh i say look at thous people thay like aunts on the ground oh yes said chelsea at last thay arrive at whippy cross hold on a bit of a bumpy ride i say chocks away .right offt you go break a la leg i hope not thay said .so get yopur copass out dealer can i call you by your first name as we are out oh go on then binky i say stinky olde beeen now lets look at thy map now lets see if we can find the hill of steven by george i think we must be near it look theres something flashing in the disstance oh i say what is it said mr pussy as they draw nearer oh look theres lots of it i say binkers its the dirty black mac boys its return of the mac .i say olde been said mr pussy why do they allways wear thous nat health brown rimmed big glasses ?how frightfully common arent they .at last they arrive at the hill of steven as they climb the summet what that snake by your leg its looks like its trying to talk to you dealer said mr pussy what type is it do you speak snake ? no i havent got that laugwich in the bag yet olde been oh look binkers said its ann adder how do you know that well its speaking in numbers i say olde bean how wonderfully spiffing .oh look dealer hes taken your number i say it looks like he wants to give you a lession in number crunching as the snake spitts out the seraonly ajusted figgers i say i think he works in the chancerly office i recon you could be right .here we are gents lets go under covers and drink tea what a spiffing idear chelsea old fruit look whats that at the middle oh its proberly a small figger as thay should out i say you over there come here as the figger egnorded them oh you as the figger turned and said look gents im not usally one for turning now naff off we i say said agent dealer what a jolly bad show simpley not cricket olde been said mr pussy ,right gents its off we go up to aker field oh look theres the newts family and there olde bill talking to them lets moove in closer to see what hes saying evening all your under arrest you lot of newts beening in charge of the cans as ol;de bill bends his legs .i say said mr pussy its a bit uncanny he books them as olde bill said you got a upto date tax disc for this pond and mot doc as the newts by then was getting larriry come on off we go to 5aker field its getting rather dark sir as they go under the olde oke trees as mr pussy says beware the nuts in september as chelsea says its not september its only may oh yes well look out for his nuts any way i say mr pussy have you got hold of youre nuts ?again as chelsea says i say thats simpley not british olde been
and now its time for part three of the dogging story woof as dealer chelsea and mr pussymeet up for the breaffing before going out on the field dynnargh welclome falite croeso so lets return to 2013.
so lets return to the office of mr platform good after noon gents so this is your finall breffing before you go out on reconacance but first as you know your going under cover oh good said dealer are we having duvets and pillers .as chelsea said i want blankets sorry mr platform said theres a blanket bann on its duvets or continentall quilts or nothing gentallmen as you know where in the common market as he looked around wheres mr pussy ashis knob started to flash as dealer said i say sir what a big knob you have .as mr platform answers where are you pussy get here now on the double quickly does it a few seconds went by as a knock on the door as mr pussy with his new pair of cats on his feet .comes in to mr platforms office attention agent pussy im going to have to throw the book at you now lets see what i have oh yes this one will do called london oh i say said dealer that must of hurt as the book hit agent pussy so explain your self well sir i had a night on the tiles and i was on the ridge one s then i lost all treck of time ,thats simpley not good enough agent pussy i see by your footware you have a new pair of cats on your feet i trust you have had them vaccinated and got the relivant papers to show me .so gentall men its 3 its time for tea oh yes sir they all say but first heres your kit youll need theres some spoonsd table tea dessert serving if you have to do the sppooon possition and some whipps to eat i love them but there so small theses days dealer said as mr pussys fone rang as he pulled it out as mr platform said what type of fone id that sir its a rough fone on the yapp yapp network ,as agent dealer said im on air earth fone 55megger bites i tell you my hands are coverd in bite s then chelsea said well im on voodooo fone under the spell ,gentel men ehough silence yes sir heres your tea as they looked on the plate there was cream slice and chocolate eclair and two sticky buns as dealer took the eclair at very ones horror aND SWALLOEED IT WHOLE YOU PIG MR PLATFORM SAID RIGHT GENTS HERES YOUR SP YOULL BE COLLECTED AT 1700 TONIGHT AND AIRLIFTED TO WHIPPY CROSS GIVEN A MAP AND CUMPACE YOUR COVERS AND FLASKOF TEA DONT FOR GET AGENTS HUCH PUPPY HE SPEAKS VERY LOW ENGLISH WHISPERS YOU KNOW AND CUFFBET FROM SPEACIAL BRANCE WHO WILL ON A BRANCE OF THE TREE SO WATCH OUT FOR HIS OFF THE CUFF REAMARKS SO GENTALL MEN SEE YOU AT 1700 SO UNTILL THE NEXT TIME END OF PART 3
as you know back on september 2ndit was 350 years of the great fire of londonon sunday 2nd setember 1666 london further from home this is uttoxeter calling dynnargh welclome falite croeso
we have all heard the story of the great fire of london which started on sunday morning of september at 1 am from pudding lane in the eastern part of the city from theking charles kings bakers in medeival part of the city the bakers shop owned by thomas faryou made lots of bread and he had big sticky buns he had a manservent who helped him on this particular night the oven was heating up in them days they was not electric or even gas they had no oven temperatures or oven lights asa the family slept a spark flew out of the oven and cought the bags of flour alight flour is a very explosive subbstance before any one knew it the place had gone up like a cinder box the houses in them days was mostley made out of wood and the streets was very narrow there was not much of a fire service and no local athority housing the only was to get water was via the river thames by bucket as the flames engulved the street the man whom tis be said wrote the daliy diary called samuel pepys about his life in medieval london ,and how earlier in 1665 they had the plauge which a lot of londerners crocked .as thomas faryou and his family jumped from a upstares winder thay ran for help the fire cunsterables rallyed around and collected and threw over concecitive buckets o0f water to try and douse the flames but they was out beeted so they went to arrouse the mayour of london sir thomas bloodworth who was natuarrly furious beeing woken up and especally beeing told sorry geezer no sticky buns or bread in the morning as the shops on fire and so every thing as well .as he came to assess the situation to no avail as the strrets burned all around him it was suddjested that some dwellings should be pulled down he was having noubt of that as the fire continued to rage accross the city .as the mayor of london went to the tower to see the wider pic of the deverstation as the city burned out of control and at thay time there was no insurace in the end the king at the time charles said ive had enough of this and offerd rewards to any one to help pull some buldings down to make a fire break . even tis be said by the man whom wrote the diarys samuel pepys even saint pauls cathedrall went up as the lead of the roof exploded as it hit the ground .after the fire was brought under control, sir christoper wren was given the job to rebuld saint popp pauls and some other buldings it took many years to rebulid london .and cost a lot of money as well as life there was many conperanthy theries at the time of the people who may of had a hand in the burning of ;london,